When Barbi sent me an email
with a photo, my eyes about popped out of my head. This She-Male is gorgeous!!
Talk about a nylon and satin Queen…incredibly sexy as well.
Barbi was sweet enough to
send lots of HOT photos for her Gallery…and when you ready her autobiography,
it’ll blow your mind!!
Here’s Barbi Satin…
Everyone has a first memory in life. Mine was of a bedtime ritual that led me to a life of fetish and perversion. It all started innocently enough. My mother would tickle my face with satin ribbons when I was a baby. This continued until I was around four years of age. I loved the feel of the satin ribbons and I do remember that my penis would get hard when my mom would tickle me. I also had a silk comforter on my bed at the time. By the time I was five years old I had figured out that rubbing back and forth on the silk felt really good. It felt so good that I was having dry orgasms up to twenty times a day from the sensations.
I instinctively knew that my behavior was not socially acceptable. I was very careful to keep my masturbatory activities from my parents. Being a precocious little pervert I began to have fantasies about pretty females wearing satin. By the time I was eight years old I had discovered a pink satin bridesmaids dress that my mom had stored in the closet in my bedroom. I removed my new treasure from the plastic bag it was stored in and slipped it on. As soon as the soft, slippery satin touched my body I was instantly erect. It is a good thing that my mom never was a bridesmaid again because within in a year I had that dress all but worn out from all the masturbation I was indulging in while wearing it.
By the time I was twelve I had managed to accumulate quite a collection of masturbatory aids including stockings, panties and some satin from a fabric store. I also had my first wet orgasm at that age. I was in a bit of shock from it and disturbed that I had ruined my favorite piece of satin! I was curious about what I had done and tasted some of my first ejaculation.
After that first wet orgasm I became even more perverse in my masturbation and fantasy life. I soon learned that if I would wear a latex exam glove on the hand I masturbated with it would make the shiny side of the satin slip and slide on my cock. The sensation was exquisite beyond words. I also learned that if I stopped masturbating just before orgasm over and over again I could build up a gigantic load of cream. I would sometimes bring myself to the edge of cumming up to fifty times before allowing myself to cum. I would also make a game of seeing just how many times I could cum in a single day. My record as a teen was twenty five times in twelve hours.
When I was fourteen I discovered my fathers collection of Penthouse magazines. He had a huge box of them stashed away in our attic. I began to read all the Penthouse Forum letters. I read all about enemas, latex fetish, leather fetish and female domination. I was fascinated by all of it and soon began to experiment with an enema bag I found in our bathroom. I also found a pair of shiny black latex kitchen gloves and added those to my masturbatory arsenal. I also started to look at the photos in the magazines during masturbation. I was drawn to the pictorials where the models wore boots, gloves, latex and leather. Of course I also loved the photo spreads that included satin sheets and lingerie. I would have fantasies about the women in the photos masturbating me with their gloves. I would also imagine that while they were giving me pleasure they were also verbally abusing and humiliating me.
By the time I started High School I was already my full adult height of 6”6 tall. I had found an Adult Bookstore in New Haven and was soon purchasing my first fetish magazines. The clerk never asked for ID because of my height. I started a collection of magazines on cross-dressing, Fem Dom, latex and leather fetish. I also purchased a magazine called Shemale Encounters that featured Sulka and Carnal Candy. I became instantly fascinated with dominant Shemales. I began to have fantasies of being a pink satin sissy maid being forced to suck their cocks and lick their assholes. I also began to experiment with dildoes then. All my fantasies were of sensual submission to females and Shemales.
I was never the least bit attracted to males but in my sophomore year I began to experiment a little. I met an older boy who came onto me. One night Bobbie played the “you show me yours and I’ll show you mine game.” Within a few moments I was wearing a pair of his mothers panties and sucking his dick. While I found nothing beautiful or attractive about him physically I did love sucking his huge cock. I imagined myself as a Shemale whore on her knees sucking off a trick and really got off on it. When he shot his load I almost gagged. He must have shot a pint of cum into my mouth.
After that I would suck him off several times a week while having fantasies that I was doing it in front of a room full of cruel women. The women would call me a sissy cock sucker and whore. I broke off this relationship after a few months went by. I had a lot of guilt and confused feelings about it. I loved sucking his cock but the truth was that I just wasn’t gay. I wanted to have a girlfriend. The problem was that the only girls I was attracted too then were the ones who were the most unattainable. I loved female beauty and the prettiest girls in school were all into dating cave men type jocks, not perverts!
In my senior year I met a young sophomore named Peter. Peter was only about 5”foot tall and looked very much like a pretty little girl. Peter was also very gay and a closet cross dresser. We became friends and I started hanging out at his house after school. His mom and dad both had jobs so we had several hours a day to ourselves.
We started with playing dress up games. Peter had some wigs and make up and I supplied satin lingerie, sheets and stockings. Peter took the name Missy and I found an adorable little playmate. Missy was as pretty as any real girl I had ever seen and soon I found myself in love for the first time in my life. I loved the fact that she had a beautiful, hard cock between her legs. I began to teach Missy all I knew about kinky sex. We would stroke each other off with satin gloves, play tickle games with ribbons and feathers and tie each other cocks up in ribbons. Before long we were indulging in sucking each other off and fucking each other. We even began to lick each other’s assholes and piss in each other’s mouths. We experimented with all the masturbation techniques I knew and even got into some light bondage and discipline. My smoking fetish also started with Missy. We both started to smoke Virginia Slims during sex play.
I never felt guilt over my sex play with Missy. She was so feminine it was like having a gorgeous girlfriend. In fact it was even better because she had the same sex drive I did. The most extreme thing we ever did was to shit on each other one day and then lick each other clean. That day still ranks as one of the top sexual experiences of my life.
At the end of my senior year her family moved out of State and I prepared for long and lonely summer before starting college. That was the worst summer of my life. I had been out all night partying and came home in the morning to find my entire kinky collection of lingerie, toys and magazines laid out on the living room floor. The ultimate nightmare for any young pervert is for your parents to discover what you are. My secret was out big time!
I just went into shock when I saw it all. The odd thing was that my parents never said a word and we played let’s pretend this never happened. My relationship with my mom never really changed after that but my dad grew cold and distant. My parents were going through a divorce at the time. After my dad moved out he never spoke to me again. Missy was gone, my dad was gone and things were pretty depressing that summer. I did the only thing I could think of. I began to drink an amazing amount of beer and smoke a lot of weed.
By the end of the summer my mom moved from Connecticut to a rural area in South Central Pennsylvania. I did go to college and did fairly well for a semester but my heart wasn’t in it. I felt totally directionless in life. I was a music major and I had thought that my future was going to be as a French Horn player in a symphony orchestra. I had real talent but my motivation was gone. At the end of the semester I moved to Pennsylvania and began a job search.
I found a job as a clerk at an adult bookstore and massage parlor. The job came with a small apartment in the back and soon I was living out some very kinky fantasies again. The store seemed to attract some very kinky couples that were into bisexual play. There was one couple that stopped in once a month looking for action. One night they stayed after closing time and I found myself getting a blowjob from the wife as I sucked off her husband.
I also shared some of my fantasies with a cute and kinky blonde named Bunny who worked as a hooker in the massage parlor. Bunny was everything I had ever dreamed of in a lot of ways. The only problem was that she was an insane sadist. I realized that things had gone too far one night while she tied me up. She shoved the biggest dildo in the store up my ass until I was bleeding. The more I screamed the heavier her breathing became. She was getting off in a big way on the pain I was going through. I cut things off at that point.
After the bookstore I went to work at a local newspaper. During that time I lived out my kinks by making trips to NYC to visit pro doms. I must have seen over fifty professional dominants but I only found one that was kinky enough for my tastes. She would masturbate me with satin and her kid gloves until I was so horny I would do anything for an orgasm. Anything included full toilet service and sucking the cocks of the other clients at the dungeon! Mistress told me it was ashamed that I was a male because I had the wildest imagination of anyone she had met in the scene. She told me I would make a great dominant.
At that point in my life I never even thought about becoming a Shemale. I still had some baby fat on my face and the attempts I had made at full feminization left a lot to be desired. I loved dressing in satin ball gowns and little girl dresses but I knew it was only fantasy and would never be more. I did want to be part of the scene however.
I saved all the money I could and quit my job. I started a mail order fetish business in 1995. Things didn’t go so well and I soon had to consider going back to work. One day when I was bored I took out my make up and started to play around. I put on one of the latex outfits I had planned to sell and took a few photos. I took a look in the mirror and was amazed at how I looked. The baby fat on my face had melted away since my last attempt.
I did the unthinkable and submitted a few of the photos to TV/TS contact magazines and advertised myself as a professional TV dominatrix. Before long I was doing sessions and having the time of my life. I wasn’t content to be a TV at that point and began to take some mild hormones. I had to be careful because the last thing I wanted was to lose my male sex drive. I began to develop small breasts within six months. I knew I would never have the breasts I wanted from hormones unless I was willing to sacrifice erections and orgasms. I never could see the point of being a TS babe only to lose all sex drive.
In 1996 I found a job at a dungeon in New Jersey. I stayed there for about a year and then went on to the big time. I heard that a new dungeon called Excalibur was looking for a TS dominatrix and I got the position. I started just before Christmas in 1997.
I was amazed at just how much the fem dom scene in NYC had changed since my days as a client. In the bad old days it was all about kink and perversion. The doms knew that it was really about SEX! By the time I arrived in the city as a pro dom it had all changed. A form of politically correct domination had taken over the houses. The rules were that you couldn’t even touch a cock unless it was to administer pain. Pleasure was not a part of the equation anymore.
I played by the rules for as long as I could stand it. No one goes to see a Shemale dominatrix who won’t indulge in the most perverse fantasies. Men see a Shemale dominatrix for one reason. They want to be forced to suck cock and swallow cum! I wanted my cock sucked and I wanted to shoot cum down their throats! I started to play by my rules and was soon the most popular T domina in the city. I was the cover girl for Feminine Illusion and Adam as Eve. I was even on Penthouse.com. I was also in constant conflict with management and the female dominants there. I was running ads in screw showing my cock at full erection. I was the biggest moneymaker at the dungeon but by the end of 1997 management had enough of it and we parted ways.
I found myself back in Pennsylvania wondering where to go next. I didn’t want to go back to doing outcalls and endless phone sex for a living. I didn’t want to go back to a dungeon either. I decided to start my own web site and produce my own very nasty fetish porn. I would have no one to answer too and could live out my perversions in front of the entire world. I had already achieved some fame from the magazines I had modeled for so going on the net seemed like the next step.
Things went very well right from the beginning. In an age of “Naked Shemales with Pretty boys porn” I was offering a throwback to the bad old days of Shemale fetish and perversion. I do most of my photo shoots with other T girls and females. Most TS these days won’t even consider doing hardcore with a female.
I am not a Transsexual at all however. A Transsexual is a woman trapped in a male body. They hate their cocks and many can’t even stand to have it touched. I am a Shemale now. I love my cock and kinky sex with females and other Shemales and TV’s.
The only problem I had was that most of the TS on the web had much bigger breasts than I did. After years of mild hormones I was barely an A cup. In the world of Shemale porn that makes you a minor leaguer. I have never been content to be in the minor leagues. Last January I drove from Pennsylvania to San Francisco for breast implant surgery. I told the surgeon to give me big; round porno boobs and that is exactly what I got. I came home with 700cc implants at a DD cup.
really do have my dream job now. My plans for the future are to just keep
pushing the envelope to the extremes of fetish porn.